How Can It Be?
by numbah 1 HPFan
Summary: Harry meets his parents for the first time at age 13. Was he angry or happy? How long did it take for him to believe that they were alive? And why, Merlin, why, did nobody ever tell him before now? HP and JP/LE


How Can It Be?

**I disclaim all that is familiar from JK Rowling's HP series.**

**Harry meets his parents for the first time. Was he angry or happy? How long did it take for him to believe that they were alive? And why, Merlin, why, did nobody ever tell him before now? **

**One-shot, Harry's POV out of chapter 22 of ****Promises to Secrets, Secrets to Lies.**

The hourglass on the chain finally stopped spinning and Kailey pulled it off of her head, looking a little dizzy from all of the spinning.

"Listen, Harry, we have to be very careful that no one sees us, alright?" she said firmly, pulling her long hair over her shoulder as she forced it through a hair tie.

"Did we just travel back in time?" I asked as she began to lead me out of the now empty hospital wing. "Wait, why are we doing this?" I hissed as she stopped suddenly and pulled me behind a suit of armor as a few students walked by.

"Weren't you listening?" she asked in reply once we had started up again. "There are some important people for you to meet tonight, Harry."

I rolled my eyes at my best friend. Why was she always so vague?

"Kailey!" a voice snapped from behind us just as we reached the doors.

"Merlin's beard," she grumbled as we turned to face Snape. "Dad, I don't have time for—"

"How in Merlin's name did you get inside of the castle?" he hissed.

Oh, right. He didn't know that she had come back yet.

"Dad, I don't have time for this! Harry and I need to get out here now or else people who shouldn't know about my…_duel_ personality will," she hissed back. "Keena's already out there and if I don't hurry," she froze, shaking her head. "Harry, show him the time-turner?"

I almost asked her what she was talking about before I realized she meant the hourglass around my neck. I pulled it up and showed it to Snape, who narrowed his eyes at me. "Dumbledore sent us," I offered when Kailey didn't make any mention of it.

Snape's eyes narrowed further, but instead of questioning it he gave us a nod. "If you do anything foolish, I will ground you for the entirety of the summer," he informed his daughter, who rolled her eyes, before he walked away from us.

We let ourselves onto the grounds and took off sprinting near the greenhouses.

"Harry, they'll meet you over there," she said, huffing slightly and pointing to a patch of trees not too far from the Whomping Willow. "Don't hex them, alright?" she added.

I laughed slightly before catching the worried look in her brown eyes. "Alright…"

She nodded. "Good luck, I'll see you soon."

I slowed my run to a walk as I stayed along the edge of the forest, watching after her as she turned suddenly into a great, black wolf. I kept my eye on her as she gave a bark, startling Remus, before the two disappeared down the tunnel.

I turned my attention back to the patch of trees she had pointed out. It didn't look as though anything was there, but I took my wand out anyway. I approached slowly, straining my eyes and wishing I had better eyesight when I caught a glimpse of something large.

I froze as a great pair of hazel eyes watched me getting nearer. It took a step closer to the light and I saw that it was a stag. His antlers were large and deadly looking, and his fur was very dark, though not as…neat, I suppose, as I would have expected.

Keena's voice sounded in my memory. "_We didn't want him to go off all alone every month so we decided to become animagi. Sirius is a dog, I'm a wolf, Pettigrew is a rat and your dad's a stag…"_

My dad is a stag, not was, but _is_.

I felt the air whoosh from my lungs as I stared at him, unable to move a step closer or further. He was there. Standing right in front of me. Waiting for me to make the first move.

"How can this be…?" I whispered, hating how my voice cracked, how my eyes felt wet.

It couldn't be that was how. It couldn't be because my parents would never leave me, not if they loved me the way everyone had always told me they had. It couldn't be because they would not have left Remus alone or Keena. It couldn't be because they wouldn't let Sirius, my godfather, remain trapped with those awful creatures.

"You're not real," I glared at the image in front of me.

The stag bowed his head, his eyes lowering as though ashamed. And he would be ashamed….wouldn't he?

"You can't be real…"

He lifted his head as the sound of a twig snapping caught his attention.

I felt myself deflating and I tore my eyes away from the creature in front of me, staring at the ground. That was it; the stag would walk away now, like any other normal animal with strange noises scaring it off. It wasn't my dad. It wasn't Prongs.

I suddenly felt very empty.

A grunt caught my attention and I looked back up to see that the stag hadn't left, that he was staring at me again. When I met his hazel eyes, he looked back again as though he were trying to tell me something.

"I don't speak stag," I ground out, remembering Kailey saying something similar to the large bear-like dog that had come barreling towards us out of the woods some months ago.

I felt myself growing angry again. If this was my dad, then why wasn't he coming to me as a human? What the bloody hell was he playing at?

Before I could get another word out the stag snorted, nodding at me.

It was like he was agreeing. It almost made me angrier.

"You are not real," I said it loudly, clearly.

But he took a step closer to me, lowering his head again. He locked eyes with me before looking back behind him again. I frowned and glanced beyond him. I couldn't quite make her out at first. She was slender and not much taller than me, probably around the same height as my only true mother figure, Keena. My godmother. But this woman's silhouette could only belong to one person.

I tried to swallow the lump in my throat as I looked back at the stag. He was watching me again before he turned away and walked towards her shape, deeper into the woods. When he reached her, his shape seemed to blur until it became that of a tall man. The two of them stood there, staring at me. Still waiting for me to make the first move.

"You can't be here," I felt like a broken record.

When he gestured for me to come closer, I took a step back and raised my wand.

"_Don't hex them…"_

How could I not? They were trying to convince me that they were…but it was not possible. I am thirteen years old. How could they possibly have left me for thirteen years?

I wanted proof before I took a step closer but then I realized he had already given me all of the proof that they had to offer. I didn't want to lower my wand, but Kailey had been right about Sirius on Halloween. Why shouldn't she be right now? I lowered it and took a deep breath before taking the first step towards them.

Part of me wanted to run to them, but part of me didn't. What if they weren't really there? What if they disappeared as soon as I got close enough? My feet weren't listening as they carried me closer to them. They weren't turning away, but they weren't coming towards me either.

It felt too soon and it felt too long, but finally I stood in front of them. Facing them.

Her hair was long, fiery and red. She was pale and beautiful and her eyes, _my_ eyes, were astonishing but sad. She wasn't quite smiling, but I could tell she wanted to. She was studying me like I was her, waiting for my reaction to seeing her. Standing there. Alive.

I couldn't smile at her.

I let my eyes travel up to his hazel ones. He was me and I was him, the same unruly hair, the same style glasses even. His nose was a bit different from mine, but the rest was my future face. He wasn't smiling either, he was all nerves. But that wasn't right, everyone had always told me he was brave and loyal, Gryffindor personified.

"Just tell me," I paused to lick my lips. "Tell me that you're…that you're real."

She tore her eyes from me for the first time to glance up at him. Then, slowly, she reached out to me with her hand, palm up, inviting me to take hold of it and see for myself.

I looked up at her, reading the doubt, the fear, the longing that I knew she was seeing in my eyes just as I saw them in hers. I glanced at him before reaching out and gently taking her hand in mine. I closed my eyes, half expecting them both to disappear. But her hand didn't leave mine and I felt him reach out and clasp a hand on my shoulder. When I opened my eyes, I shuddered, not caring that I was crying and I let them close the distance between us.

"You're alive," I whispered as they hugged me from both sides.

"Yes, Harry," her voice was so sweet, so perfect. "We're alive, we're here."

"And we'll never leave you again," he sounded so sure, so protective and strong.

I felt her shaking as she cried and I heard him sniff as he tried to cover up his own tears. I wanted to tell him that he could cry, that it was alright, I didn't mind. But I couldn't open my mouth to say those words.

"We love you," she whispered once the tears had halted. "So very much."

I leaned away from them then. Did she mean it? Could she really mean that?

"Kailey knew...which means Keena knew," I stated. "Who else?"

"Remus found out not long ago," he replied quietly. "I'm fairly certain Dumbledore knows as well. Sirius has lived with us since his escape."

"We know you're angry, Harry, but don't take it out on your godmother. She was only doing as we asked of her," she stated firmly, though still hardly above a whisper. Then her eyes teared up again as she smiled. "You've grown so very much…and we know about all of the things you've done. Harry, we are so proud of you."

"They told you everything?" I asked, hardly daring to believe it. "And you aren't even the slightest bit mad?"

I wanted them to be mad for some of it. I wanted them to be…normal. Mrs. Weasley had been furious with Ron about the flying car. Snape had been furious with Kailey about just about everything. Even Hermione's parents had been upset even though they hadn't quite understood about the stone.

He snorted slightly. "Oh, we were plenty angry about you going after that stone during your first year and when Keena told us about the chamber your mother sent her a howler for not preventing it."

"But we're happier that you're alright. Your safety is what matters most to us, Harry," she interrupted, squeezing my hand gently. "We just want you safe."

Safe with the Dursleys? Safe fighting Voldemort and Quirrel? Safe against a Basilisk? Safe with a man like Wormtail on the loose?

"And now we see…my sister made us see, that even if you might not be safest with us, you…Harry, we love you," he seemed unable to say anything more than that.

But, even though I was angry, even though I couldn't understand why they had left or come back, I just wanted…I wanted them. I _needed_ them.

"Let me live with you," the words flooded from my mouth as I gazed at them imploringly. "Please, don't…don't…"

"Of course, Harry, you're going to live with us, if that's what you want," she said, a smile breaking through her face for the first time. She pulled me into a hug again, kissing my head and murmuring things that a mother should to her frightened, lonely child, even if he was too stubborn to admit that it was what he wanted from her.

I looked up at him from the comfort of her arms to see that he was looking beyond us to where the Whomping Willow was.

"Lily, we've better transform, they're coming out."

With a last kiss to my forehead, she took a step back from me and soon the stag and a doe were standing before me. He gave me a gentle nudge and I wiped my eyes as we headed to the edge of the forest to watch the group of them go by.

Kailey and Hermione were slightly ahead of the group, followed by Sirius, Ron and…well, _me_. Behind them followed Keena, Wormtail and Remus.

"We used a time-turner," I mumbled when I noticed the doe looking from me to the other me in what seemed to be confusion.

Kailey stretched oddly for a moment and Hermione followed where she was pointing. I could hear her surprise from where I was standing as she quickly figured out who the stag and doe must be.

I watched in rage as Wormtail transformed but before I could do anything, the stag took off running towards where the rat seemed to be going. I didn't hesitate to follow as the doe sprinted off behind him, though she cast several looks over her shoulder. I couldn't tell if she wanted me to follow or not, but I went anyway.

When we finally reached the stag he was already human again, pacing and cursing under his breath before he spotted me. We were on the opposite side of the lake from where Sirius, Kailey and I would soon be.

"Harry, you shouldn't've followed me," he scolded, taking his wand out.

"It was either follow you and risk meeting up with Wormtail or not follow you and risk getting attacked by Remus…oh no, Remus!"

I turned to look across the lake in time to see Sirius slump to the ground. The doe transformed back into a human, cupped her hands around her mouth and howled without warning. We quickly joined her, our voices echoing across the lake, sounding as though they were coming from deeper within the woods than we really were. The werewolf tore away into the trees and she sighed in relief as we watched Sirius and Kailey transform back into their human selves.

"The dementors are coming," I whispered glancing up to see he had a grim look upon his face.

The cold barely reached us from across the lake as the beasts swarmed around Sirius, Kailey and me. Blips of silver flashed on and off again as we stood, waiting for someone to make the patronus that would send them all away.

"I couldn't fight them off last time," I whispered, looking up at him.

"We'll fight them off now!" he shouted, lifting his wand.

I looked back across as I raised my own wand to see one was lowering its hood. It was trying to kiss Kailey.

"_EXPECTO_ _PATRONUM_!" we shouted in unison.

My stag and his doe burst forth from our wands, sprinting across the water and colliding with the dementors, forcing them away from the three of them.

I lowered my wand as the patronuses returned to us, panting slightly.

"What memory did you use?" I whispered out of curiosity as the silver light disappeared.

He put an arm around my shoulder. "You—you're birth, you're first birthday, you're first broom ride and our first meeting," he paused. "What did you use?"

I looked up at him and suddenly all of my anger seemed to float away. It was replaced with a strange euphoria that I didn't quite understand. I smiled at him. "My first hug from my mum and dad."

He grinned at me and I was instantly reminded of Sirius for some reason.

The three of us walked made our way over to the other shore where the other three lay unconscious.

"I'll take Sirius and this Harry up to the castle," he…my dad, said conjuring up three gurneys and levitating them onto them. "Lily, Harry, why don't you take Kailey up?"

Before she…my mum, could reply a silver dog came loping over to us.

"Ron, Hermione and I are safe; I've sent word up to Dumbledore to bring us some help. If you need any other help I'll come running," it said in Keena's voice. The dog slowly disappeared and dad took out his wand and sent out another doe.

"There, we should be all set now," he said, sounding satisfied.

We walked together to the stairs of the castle before mum and I let dad go ahead of us with two of the gurneys; we didn't want to confuse Madame Pomfrey too much.

It didn't end up mattering in the end as dad hadn't seemed to have explained anything in the time between his entering and our entering. Snape's face was priceless as he looked from his daughter lying on the gurney and Keena standing in front of him.

"But—?" he said, looking from one to the other.

"Severus, perhaps it is best you sit down," Dumbledore suggested calmly. "And perhaps you could explain how you are in two places at once?" he directed at Keena. But she just shrugged and pointed to me.

"He must know," she stated.

"We borrowed Hermione's time turner," I replied.

Just as I said it the other me started to wake up.

"Oh, that's not good," Keena mumbled and mum and dad each took a hold of my arm and rushed us over to one of the beds where the screens were hanging, ready to be drawn. They drew the screens, both of them looking a little worried.

"It wouldn't be good for you to see yourself in the past," mum explained, noticing the confused look on my face.

"It is safe to come out now," Dumbledore called after a moment.

We emerged from behind the screens and I lifted the time-turner over my head, handing it to Dumbledore, who pocketed it.

"I think it's best that you get some real rest now, Harry," Dumbledore said quietly.

Pomfrey didn't need telling twice and she quickly forced me into a bed, hardly pausing to flick her wand in order to dress me in the hospital shirt and pants. I didn't look at Ron and Hermione as they stared at me from across the room. Snape, on the other hand, had seemed to snap out of it and was now glaring at my dad.

But dad either didn't notice or didn't care as he and mum took the seats next to my bed where Keena and Remus normally sat. Mum reached out and took my hand and I gave her a weak smile, the euphoric feeling still rising up in my chest as she looked at me.

I yawned suddenly and my dad chuckled.

"'M sorry," I mumbled, unsure why I was suddenly fighting to keep my eyes open.

"No, son, you've had a long night," he answered, ruffling my messy hair, _his_ messy hair, with one hand.

"Go on and sleep, Harry," mum insisted. "We'll still be here in the morning."

I don't know how it could be but I knew that I would believe and disbelieve it every time they promised to be there for me. I knew that I would both forgive them now and be unable to forgive them for years.

How can it be that you could suddenly meet someone for the first time and love them so much that it hurts?

**Poor Harry, he's still flip-flopping in the main story, a year and a half later…Oh well! I hope you enjoyed it (a review would not go amiss)! An update to the main series will be coming soon to a computer screen near you!**

**:-D **


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